Lately, I’ve been thinking a lot about singleness and marriage. Since my wife’s passing back in October of 2010, I have found myself hanging mostly with those who are single. I seem to gravitate toward them more than those who are married. When Paula was alive, we fellowshipped with those who were married more than those who are single. It is interesting how people will feel a pull toward those they find common ground with.
But since I’ve been hanging with single people a lot, I have heard their views about singleness and marriage. To be frank, some of what I have heard scares me. Some elevate singleness over and beyond marriage and others do not have a clue what marriage actually entails. I’ve gone away with more questions than answers. Therefore, I have decided to go to the one place where I can discover God’s mind on both singleness and marriage. There is no better place than in 1 Corinthians 7. I will be doing a series of blogs on this topic. I hope you will study with me and allow God’s Word to shape your views concerning both singleness and marriage.
Let’s begin with this question: Should I marry or should I not marry?
Marriage is, let's face it, a very hot item today. There are more books being written on that subject, I think, than any other one subject. The Bible has a lot to say about marriage. There is much in the New Testament about marriage. Jesus taught much about marriage. He referred to marriage many times in the gospel records. He stated in Matthew 19 that man and woman were made for each other. God made them for each other. He states that they should join themselves together and become one flesh and that this was marriage and this was actually a joining together by God Himself. Jesus also emphasized that marriage was monogamous, that it was to be two becoming one flesh, something that was first stated by God in Genesis chapter 2. Jesus also taught in Matthew 19 that marriage was to be unbroken. God hadn't changed His attitude at all about divorce. It was wrong from the beginning and it is still wrong, except in some rare occasions which we will discuss.
Jesus also taught not only that marriage was designed by God to be monogamous and to be unbroken, but that it was only for this life. Matthew 22:30, Mark 12:25, Luke 20:35, are all references that indicate marriage is only for this earth and not for heaven.
Now before digging deeper into the contents of 1 Corinthians 7, let me say something about the so-called “disclaimer” Paul seemed to use. Because it is Paul’s wording that has thrown some people for a loop and as a result, they do not take what Paul says in 1 Corinthians too seriously.
Here is what I mean. There are times when Paul says that he is giving his “opinion” rather than a command from Jesus. For example, over in verse 12, Paul writes: “To the rest I say, not the Lord, that if a brother has a wife who is an unbeliever, and she consents to live with him, let him not send her away.” Some read this passage and conclude that Paul is merely giving his opinion and it is not as weighty as the words of Jesus Himself.
Now go down to verse 25, and there Paul adds: “Now concerning virgins I have no command of the Lord, but I give an opinion as one who by the mercy of the Lord is trustworthy.” Thus again, some will conclude that Paul’s opinion is not as trustworthy as Jesus’ command, so we are to take what Paul says here very lightly.
Then verse 40, "But in my opinion she is happier if she remains as she is; and I think that I also have the Spirit of God.”
So what are we to do with such statements by Paul? How much weight do we put on these verses? We are to put as much weight on Paul’s opinion as we place on the commands of Jesus Himself. When Paul makes his opinion statements, all he is saying is this: “Jesus did not teach on this issue. So let me offer you my thoughts as one who is led by the Spirit of God.” In other words, Paul would give Jesus’ command about virgins and about being married to an unbeliever if such a command existed. But since Jesus did not teach on it, Paul offers his instructions instead. And Paul instructions were inspired by the Holy Spirit and every word he wrote was superintended by the Spirit of God and therefore infallible in its teachings. Thus, Paul’s instructions are to be placed on the same par as the very commands and words of Jesus.
Now when Jesus did touch on an issue, Paul was careful to note it. For example, in verse 10 and you'll see what I mean. "Unto the married, I command, yet not I but the Lord, let not the wife depart from her husband." And you see, he quotes right out of the Lord's words in Mark 10. So, when he says it's not the Lord but himself, he is saying--I'm no longer quoting the teaching of Jesus. He is not saying it doesn't matter what I say, it's only human opinion. No. He is simply saying sometimes I'm quoting Christ, sometimes I'm not. And really what he's doing is putting himself on an equal basis with Christ in terms of revelation. So, Paul is simply saying – “If I'm quoting the Lord, I'll say it. If I'm not, I'll tell you it's not a quote of the Lord's, it's therefore some new information I am instructing you in.
End of Part 1 - To Be Continued
