Wednesday, November 1, 2017

“I’m Sorry, You Are No Longer Welcome Here,” Part 3B

The purpose of church discipline is the spiritual restoration of fallen members and the consequent strengthening of the church and glorifying of the Lord. When a sinning believer is rebuked and he turns from his sin and is forgiven, he is won back to fellowship with the body and with its head, Jesus Christ.
The goal of church discipline, then, is not to throw people out of the church or to feed the self-righteous pride of those who administer the discipline. It is not to embarrass people or to exercise authority and power in some unbiblical manner. The purpose is to restore a sinning believer to holiness and bring him back into a pure relationship within the assembly. – Grace Church

In Matthew 18:15-17:  “If your brother sins against you, go and tell him his fault, between you and him alone. If he listens to you, you have gained your brother. 16 But if he does not listen, take one or two others along with you, that every charge may be established by the evidence of two or three witnesses. 17 If he refuses to listen to them, tell it to the church. And if he refuses to listen even to the church, let him be to you as a Gentile and a tax collector.

There are proper steps to take to make the restoration of a rebellious sinner a successful encounter.

Step 1 – PRIVATE Encounter – Go to him or her in private (v. 15).

If that works, you have won your brother or sister back. If it does not work, then move up to –

Step 2 – PLURAL Encounter – Take with you two or more that will become witnesses (v. 16).

Here the witnesses will to three things:
A.    Verbally assist you in trying to win the brother or sister back.
B.    Pray silently for you as you speak to the wayward brother or sister again.
C.   Witness the response of the rebellious brother or sister. If repentance occurs, the people you bring with you will witness that awesome event and report it accordingly. If he or she refuses to repent, those you brought with you will also be witnesses of that as well and become instrumental in third step –

Step 3 – PUBLIC Encounter – Tell it to the church (v. 17).

Here the witnesses and the Christian whom chose them to become part of the process now take the matter to the leadership and the leaders bring it to the rest of the body (membership) and now – EVERYONE becomes a means to try to win the sinning brother or sister back.  Remember, the goal is always to restore the sinning saint, not to kick him or her out or to embarrass.  Now kicking a person out or embarrassment maybe used as a means toward restoration, but the means are simply the tools God uses to light a fire under the sinner to help him or her to wake up!

Remember this:  The goal of all preaching, teaching, counseling and yes, even church discipline is this:

To Comfort the Afflicted.
To Afflict the Comfortable.

The means that God afflicts the comfortable sinning saint with are embracement (as more and more people become aware of the situation in steps 2 and 3), and dejection (where a person is asked to leave) and no close association as once was when the person was in true fellowship with the body is maintained). 

So both –
1.   Embarrassment – where Paul says that a lazy unrepentant sinner may be “put to shame” (cf. 2 Thess. 3:14).
2.   Disassociation – Where Paul said, “remove the wicked man from among yourselves” (cf. 1 Cor. 5:13). 

Again, these are only the means God uses to add holy pressure to the sinner, not the goal. The goal is always repentance and restoration. But in order to achieve the goal, you need the proper means in place for the Holy Spirit to successfully use.

Here, let me give you an example.

Remember the story of the Prodigal Son in Luke 15? A certain father had two sons and one of them decides to rebel and leave the protective and loving care of his father?

So the rebellious son demands his share of his wealth (v. 12) and goes to a distant country where he lives loosely and squandered his money (v. 13).

Now watch this – verse 14: “And when he had spent everything, a severe famine arose in that country, and he began to be in need.

Notice the sequence:

Spent everything – Ran out of money  
Severe famine – Uncontrollable circumstances  
Began to be in need – Personal affliction and stress

Do you see that past phrase, “he began to be in need?” That is where you want the sinning saint to be – IN NEED!

Now let’s follow the story and watch carefully what God uses to bring restoration to this wayward son.

v. 15: “So he went and hired himself out to one of the citizens of that country, who sent him into his fields to feed pigs.

He ran out of money so he went to find a job. He found one that forced him to feed PIGS!  You know what the irony of this was? This boy was Jewish.  Jews wanted nothing to do with pigs. But when you are desperate and in need, you will do anything to survive – even compromising your own convictions.  This Jewish boy is working for a Gentile who gives him a job to feed the pigs!  This was all from the Lord!  God is not making this easy for him, is he?

v. 16:  “And he was longing to be fed with the pods that the pigs ate, and no one gave him anything.”

God had created such a need in this boy’s life that he noticed that the pigs were doing better than he was. That was embarrassing and humbling to him. Furthermore, no one helped him and gave him anything. Do you think that was cruel? No, that was God.

“How can you say that, Pastor Rich?”

Look at verse 17-19: “But when he came to himself, he said, ‘How many of my father's hired servants have more than enough bread, but I perish here with hunger! 18 I will arise and go to my father, and I will say to him, “Father, I have sinned against heaven and before you. 19 I am no longer worthy to be called your son. Treat me as one of your hired servants.”’
Notice the beginning of verse 17, “when he came to himself.”  He woke up! He saw the light! He began to see the truth!

And it was then that he started to think seriously about repenting from his sin and going back to his father to make things right.

Now notice what God used –

Spent everything – Ran out of money  
Severe famine – Uncontrollable circumstances  
Began to be in need – Personal affliction and stress
Fed (became a servant to) pigs
Embarrassment – saw that the pigs were better off than he was
Afflicted – No one helped him in his time of need

It was only after the above things that “he came to himself” and started mentally on the road to repentance.

I am going to say this again and this needs to be stressed:  When we use our emotions and step in to try to help, we often times do more harm than good. We must allow the sin of the sinner to RUN ITS COURSE! This means, we step back, pray for the person, and let God create the environment needed for repentance and restoration to occur.

If we try to step in and become a rescuer and an enabler – we will royally mess things up and the sinning brother or sister is doomed to remain wallowing in their rebellion a lot longer than needed. We will do so much better to let God be God and let Him work in the heart of the sinner, while we stay out of the way.

Listen, God uses extreme means (suffering, needs, affliction, embarrassment, etc.) to bring extreme repentance, because for some it requires extreme measures.

When the bible says that the boy “came to himself,” what was he before this? He was out of his mind! He wasn’t thinking right. He wasn’t walking in the truth. He was operating in the realm of spiritual insanity. That’s the realm of rebellion.

It is only when God turns up the heat on the sinning saint, that the sinner becomes closer to coming out of his state of spiritual insanity and into his right mind, which then leads to making the right choices in coming home.

If you finish the story of the Prodigal Son, you will notice that he does go home, repents to his father and the father, who has been looking for him, with open arms and heart receives his son back (vv. 22-24). 

But here is one more thing I want to bring home regarding this story.

When the son decided to leave his father to go on his own in rebellion, the father NEVER chased after the son and tried to appease him (vv. 12-13). The father sadly let him go, entrusted God to his care, and let God create the necessary environment (affliction) as a means to bring his son back home.

Do not chase the sinner in order to enable him or her so they can only continue longer in their sin. Step back, pray and watch with a concern heart for signs that God is moving in the person’s life in bringing them home.

Do not play the role of God.


End of Part 3B

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